Twenty, and The Harbinger.
It was just over two weeks ago that I turned 20. When this happens to some people, I think it takes a while for it to sink in that they will never be a teenager ever again. I don’t feel old. Maybe when I turn 21 and can legally go out and buy a drink, I’ll feel it. Being 20 is like being 19, honestly.
I don’t even know if I’ve grown a lot. Obviously not physically, I’m talking about Spiritually. I do hear it a lot though, and the past year has been a whirlwind that I never really saw coming at such a strong force. It is encouraging, yet somehow I feel like I don’t deserve to be told how much I’ve “grown”. I still feel like a child. I think I’ll always feel a sense of helplessness when I try to grow myself. That’s because I’ll never be able to do anything on my own, which is a good thing. That is why there is so much comfort in giving everything to God.
I have a drawing final that I’m working on and not too thrilled about. It’s a three-part project and it is due this Thursday after class. It has me slightly worried, but why on earth should I be worrying about something so small when the God of the universe has my entire life mapped out for me? I don’t know. I’m still up and the clock will strike 3AM in fifteen minutes. I’m sleepy. This post probably makes you want to sleep (and I apologize if it is and you really shouldn’t be falling asleep right now).
On a side note, I don’t know why or how I am so blessed to have some extremely talented friends. A few of them are in a band, “The Harbinger”, which had its first concert on Friday in a small art gallery known as The Eckhaus. I want you to picture the size of a living room and a half, with maybe 30-50 people packed in like a can of sardines. This is The Eckhaus whenever a concert is put on, which I believe is quite often if there isn’t an art exhibition going on (obviously…). The Harbinger covered a couple of Underoath songs, since the band is breaking up and they’re quite sad about the whole thing. I went in there thinking I would die, because I would be up front taking pictures in front of a guy screaming and really loud instruments. I didn’t die, but I felt the bass through my whole body and I owe it to the earbuds I stuffed in. I was pleasantly surprised because I ened up really enjoying myself. Mainly because I was asked to take pictures, but also because these were my friends performing. I can’t write any more, and my eyelids can’t stay open for much longer. Maybe I’m drained.